Suriya urged parents to ease the pressure they place on children to top classes and win competitions, saying an obsession with marks and aggressive competition can make children less sensitive to others

An old video of actor Suriya asking parents not to exert pressure on their children to always be the first has resurfaced on social media. The South star urged parents to let children enjoy their childhood without being pushed into aggressive competition.

Speaking with Vanitha TV, Suriya spoke about the education system's obsession on high cutoff marks and the way parents can unintentionally pass their own anxieties on to children.

“If they're getting 18 marks, you're not happy. ‘You didn't come first. Oh, you didn't come first at all in class.' We put that in their mind,” he said.

The actor argued that the pressure was reinforced by an education system where high cutoffs and intense competition were the norm. “The university is always asking for a 99.9 percent cutoff and there is a lot of competition,” he said, adding that there are also opportunities for children to simply “enjoy their childhood.”

Suriya On Parents Celebrating Child's Achievements

The actor also questioned the way some parents celebrate their children's achievements without considering how those celebrations might affect other children and their families.

“If your daughter is coming first, you come back and say, ‘You've got 20 marks, superb, you're the first in class.' What will another child go through? What will another parent go through?” he asked.

Suriya clarified, though, that he was not against competition itself. “That hardcore competitiveness is nice. Just let them not be very, very aggressive about it. At least make them a little sensitive towards these things,” he said.

Suriya Recalls An Incident From His Son's Sports Day

To illustrate his point, he recalled an incident from his son Dev's school sports day that shaped his perspective on how naturally empathetic children can be.

He shared that Dev was taking part in a race in which the children had to sprint, pick up a water bottle and return to the finish line. According to Suriya, Dev was among the fastest runners and had a good chance of winning.

He, however, stopped during the race to pick up a blue bottle in another lane because it was his favourite colour. He then noticed that he started looking for something else instead of heading back. 

While the other children crossed the finish line, Dev returned not just with one bottle but with another pink bottle because his sister Diya would also be there.

“He told me, ‘Appa, I liked blue colour so I went and picked up my blue. But I can't come back alone with one bottle. Diya will be there. Diya likes pink. So, I was searching for pink',” Suriya recalled, referring to his daughter. “Now we have two water bottles, one for me and one for Akka.”

Dev did not win the race. For Suriya, the decision mattered more than the result because his son had prioritised his sister without being told to do so.

What impressed Suriya further was how Dev showed a healthy attitude towards the classmate who finished ahead of him. Rather than being upset, Dev praised the boy for being the fastest runner in the class while recognising his own strengths.

“He said, ‘He runs very well. Nobody can beat him. He's the fastest in our class.' But then he said, but I can draw well. He can't draw as good as me,” Suriya recalled.

“Nobody had coached him to think that way,” the actor said, adding, “Dev was able to clearly say, ‘I am good in certain things and he is good in certain things. So, it is fine.'”

Suriya and Jyothika's Personal Life

The couple are proud parents to two children. They welcomed daughter Diya in 2007, and son Dev was born in 2010. The family moved from Chennai to Mumbai last year so the children could attend IB-curriculum schools.